


The Great Divide Chapter 10: Never again

by Antigravity_Carnivore



Series: The Great Divide [10]
Category: Breaking Benjamin (Band), STARSET (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Angst, Band Fic, Computers, Emotional Manipulation, F.E.C., Fantasy, Fluff and Angst, Future, Gay, Gay Male Character, Heavy Angst, Inspired by Music, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Music, Science Fiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 10:54:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11622075
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antigravity_Carnivore/pseuds/Antigravity_Carnivore
Summary: Dustin Bates has his chance to confront Thomas Bell, but is forced from Prox once again to deal with a startling and unexpected danger from the past who could ultimately destroy the future.





	The Great Divide Chapter 10: Never again

Staring at me in disbelief and shock, Brock slipped out of my arms and went to Thomas without an answer. I could tell that I upset him with my question and wished that I could take it back, but it was too late. I had done it again, always making the wrong choices and fucking things up. The moment he left my side I could feel the harsh, cold Prox air surround me and creep into my bones causing involuntary shivering. Part of me wanted to reach forward and grab him, pull him back to me and never let go. A moment ago, we were so close, and then he just slipped away. Was this a premonition of things to come? I watched him as he moved across the cave gracefully and knelt down next to Thomas who was looking completely confused and disorientated. Brock spoke to him gently in a reassuring tone. “Thomas, we’re close to the Northern sector of Prox, about a half day’s ride away from the secondary Messenger encampment.”

He looked from Brock to me with a furrowed brow, trying to process the bits of information Brock had just given him. “The Shallow Bay? Commander Burnley said that facility is off limits, we are to have no contact with them, as to avoid discovery, why would we go there? Wouldn’t that be putting them in danger?” He stopped and looked around. “Wait, where is the Commander? How did I get out here?” His eyes fell over Brock, who was still dressed in the F.E.C. gear and he immediately tried to retreat back further against the wall, like a scared, frightened animal. “You are with those monsters, get away from me!” he shouted, his voice shaky and uneven, a total change from the Thomas who we confronted in the Messengers base. 

“Thomas, calm down. I was working with the F.E.C. to gather information for Benjamin. I am one of his…” he paused, almost as if trying to figure out the proper word. I knew that he wouldn’t use the term ‘friend’, that would be too much. I waited. “Commander Burnley and I are associates. I’ve known him for a long time.” Brock explained casually. He always had the virtue and patience of a saint, and spoke to Thomas gently, like a mother would to a child. It made me feel a little uncomfortable. I wanted to go over there and pull him away. “I am on your side, it’s alright, and you can trust me.”

I couldn’t take it any longer. Brock’s blind trust and soothing tone irritated me. I decided to speak my mind. Screw the consequences. “We don’t know what side he is on!” I snapped, suddenly and rather harshly, glaring at Thomas from across the fire. “Don’t fall for this innocent act, Brock. Move away from him.” I was surprised by my own unexpected outburst. The words just slipped right out of my mouth without any thought behind them. “He’s only been conscious for 30 seconds and you’re ready to treat him like he’s your best friend!” I exhaled and took a moment to try and calm myself down. Brock may have been able to see him as a friend, but in my mind, all I could see was the homicidal lunatic perched on top of the man that I loved with a murderous look on his face, and the one that snapped an innocent girl’s neck. 

“Dustin stop it! We don’t know anything for certain yet. I know you’re ready to string the guy up and move on with it, but we have to be certain. Give him a moment to sort things out, don’t be so hasty, what’s wrong with you? Just relax.” Brock turned his attention back towards Thomas, obviously annoyed, not waiting for an answer from me. “Tell me, what the last thing you can remember is?” he asked.

Thomas lowered his head, lost in thought for a few moments and then spoke quietly. “It’s hard to piece things together; it feels like everything is jumbled together inside of my brain. God, it’s so cold out here…There’s information inside my head that isn’t mine, it’s fragmented but I do remember I got back from the F.E.C. base with Dustin Bates, he was in very bad shape.” He stopped and looked up at me, staring at me with piercing green eyes. These were the same eyes that had looked upon me with such hatred and loathing only a few short hours before. I couldn’t see any of that animosity now, it was almost as if it had all melted away, leaving traces of the real man behind, and I regretted my hasty words. I was feeling anxious and shaky, there was something happening to me. Trying my best to ignore it, I focused on Thomas’s words as best I could as he continued on. “Commander Burnley dismissed me…was busy with… um.. or ah rather… preoccupied with something else….so I returned to my quarters to check out the device I had taken.” Thomas looked to Brock guiltily. “Yes, I stole the visor from the F.E.C. I knew that it had to have other uses than what they were using it for. It has incredible healing properties; I was certain that I could reformat it and make use of it. I was only thinking of the endless possibilities of it; I didn’t know what would happen.” He hung his head in shame.

“It’s alright, Thomas we’re not here to accuse you of anything, we are just trying to piece some things together.” Brock smiled and reassured him. “Please continue on.”

Thomas shook his head, his matted and tangled brown curls falling against his face and into his eyes. He took a moment to push them away. “When I picked up the visor, there was a message on the screen for me. It had MY name on it. Someone knew I had it, they knew things… about me… things that I’ve kept secret. The message was basically a threat. Unless I accessed the visor myself, this information would be released to the mass public, putting myself and… others in danger.” Thomas clasped his bound hands together. “I couldn’t risk it… I did what the message said. I didn’t have any other choice.”

I stood up from the ground, throwing the blanket off me, momentarily forgetting about the cold; a feeling of anger welling inside of me. “No other choice? So you risked everyone’s life in an effort to keep your little secret safe? Well your gamble didn’t pay off, because of you, hundreds of people, families, are all dead now Thomas, including Lizzie! She was in love with you, but you didn’t know that because you were too fucking self-absorbed. If you took a moment of your time out to pay attention to the people around you instead of using them, you might learn something. How can you be so stupid?”

“Lizzie? What happened to her? I… I… didn’t mean to harm anyone. I just wanted to… protect… him.” Thomas lowered his head. 

I balled my hands up into fists; I had enough of his innocent act. I knew exactly what he was talking about. Something inside of me snapped, beads of sweat crept up over my body. “Protect who, Thomas? Go on say it. Say the name of the man that you almost killed.” Thomas looked away from me, then to Brock, searching for help, or possibly a sane explanation. Brock kept his back to me; I couldn’t read him at all. This was not the brainwashed Thomas, this was the shy, socially awkward leader of the Messengers now, anyone could see that, but I started down a path now and I was committed to see it through to the end, picking him apart as much as I could. I wanted Brock to feel the hate that I did, make him understand. He HAD to understand. I tried my best to control the tone of my voice, but as I spoke it was clearly laced with jealousy; a deaf man could hear it. “You wanted to protect Benjamin, didn’t you? He didn’t need your help, he never did. Anyone who has ever met him can tell you that much. You needed the secret that the two of you were together to be safe because YOU couldn’t handle the truth. If all those people knew about you and Benjamin, you thought that they would have less respect for you, and that’s what you wanted so badly isn’t it? Respect? You wanted to be like Benjamin, a natural born leader, one who people would follow blindly. You can’t lead them Thomas, you NEED Benjamin, but he doesn’t need you. You are the reason why things fell apart! If you had been the real leader that the people needed, things would of never have gotten this bad.” The beads of sweat increased and formed on my face and as a strange heat rushed through my veins, voice grew louder. I saw Brock stand up and turn around to face me as I continued. He had finally had enough of my accusations; still I continued my verbal assault on the weakened man. “Well you know what you got now, Thomas? Nothing! All your Messengers including the girl who loved you are dead, your base is overrun with Carnivores and Benjamin is missing. The worst part to all of this is that, if we ever do find him, he’s not going to ever look at you the same way again, because you fucking blinded him!”

Thomas gasped and went pale, pulling the blankets up around him tighter. “What do you mean?”

“HE trusted you and you stuck that goddamn visor on him and tried to make him one of your fucking controlled freaks! That’s right, you wanted him as your puppet, and went it didn’t go as you planned, you ripped the visor off of him while he was unconscious when the process was still in operation and it burned out his eyes. He will never see again, and it’s all on you…but you will never feel guilty about it because you were ‘brainwashed’ am I right? You don’t have to go to sleep at night hearing him scream, smell the burning flesh or see the blood pouring out of his burnt out eye sockets.” I glared at him. “But I will… forever! I wish that when you put that visor on, it would have killed you, we’d all be better off.”

 

“Dustin. Outside, now.” Brock ordered, moving to step in front of me. The normal, easy going expression on his face change to one of seriousness and I didn’t like it. I ignored him for a moment, my eyes trained and fixed on the man across the room who I hated more than anything else in the world. 

I looked over his shoulder and pointed at Thomas, who was cowering in the corner, staring at me with a horrified expression. “No! He has to be held responsible for what he’s done. I don’t understand why you are codling him, Brock. A few hours ago, this piece of garbage was kicking the shit out of you, remember? Aren’t those bruises all over your face enough evidence to prove that he’s a violent, sadistic person? Remember what he said he was going to do to you? That wasn’t a threat, he was completely capable of doing that, and I pretty sure that he still is. Lizzie made the mistake of trusting him and look where it got her.” I shouted. “I wish that it was Thomas that was left back there on the floor dead, and Lizzie lived, her life is worth a hundred times more than his.”

Brock placed a hand on my chest and gave me a light push. The penetration wounds bored into my flesh by the Carnivore’s claws instantly pulsed with a tremendous pain, and I stepped back, slightly out of breath. He was obviously bullying me into submission. It felt strange and awkward. I had to resist the urge to push back; this was Brock, not some random person. I couldn’t ever hurt him. “Outside, please.” Brock repeated, his voice strong and firm, showing no signs of wavering. I looked into his eyes, the defiance I saw in there was firm and resolute. There was no way I was going to win this round. I wasn’t feeling well, my head was spinning, I decided that it was easier just to do as he asked. Perhaps it would be better to reason with him away from the traitor. I couldn’t bear the sight of him any longer anyway. I sighed and walked past Thomas who was still bound by his wrists and cowering on the floor with Brock following me. 

It was the early morning hours and the sky was painted with an eerie purplish hue over the horizon as we exited the cave. For some reason, the cold didn’t seem to affect me so much, but instead, the cool air refreshed me, a welcome change from the stale, arid humidity inside. Brock pulled his jacket tight around his thin frame and turned to me. “What the hell is wrong with you? You have NO right talking to him like that. He clearly doesn’t understand what he’s done. It’s not our place to judge him, he’s going to the Messengers in the Shallow Bay and they can choose what to do with him, not us.”

I wiped the sweat off my head I was beginning to feel a little dizzy, why was it so hot out here? Brock didn’t seem to be effected by it. “He gave the order that killed all those people that were trying to escape! He murdered Dr. Wise and Lizzie, and tried to rape and murder Ben, and would have done the same to you, and yet you want to assume he’s completely innocent because the visor brainwashed him? No Brock, I won’t accept that. He needs to answer for his crimes, and I don’t see how handing him off to the Messengers is going to do that. You heard him, the rebels don’t exchange information between the bases, we have no proof that he did those things. It’s our word against theirs and who do you think they are going to believe us, or him? We have the opportunity to do something about it right here, right now. Justice for Lizzie. We will never have a chance like this again; no one will ever need know what happened to him.”

Narrowing his eyes at me, Brock gave me a horrified look. “Dustin, I have never heard or seen you act this way before. Listen to yourself. You are suggesting we kill a man, in cold blood with our bare hands, who may or may not be held accountable for his actions. I know you have your doubts, but what if the effects of the visor are truly reversed now? If this is the case then you’re condemning an innocent man to death. Think about it for a moment, if that was you in there, and I KNOW you know what I am talking about, wouldn’t you want someone on your side?” He walked over to me and took my hands in his, holding onto them tightly. I wanted to pull away at first, but the moment his skin touched mine, I knew I couldn’t let go or draw away. “This isn’t our home, Dustin. These aren’t our people; we have no right to say who lives or who dies. He doesn’t have anyone now.” He dropped his voice very low, so that it was almost a whisper. I watched his lips move as he spoke, completely transfixed. “I know how you feel towards Benjamin, and you want revenge for what happened, but this is not the way to do it. I need you, Dustin. I need you to do the right thing here. Please. For me.”

I knew he was right. I have never been a person prone to violence or insane fits of anger and rage. This was something quite new for me, and I hated it. What was happening to me? I held his hands in mine and felt how cool they were. One touch is all that it took to calm me down. Brock always seemed to have that effect on me. “I am sorry, I just let things get to me, you’re right.” My fingers intertwined with his and I pulled him close to me. He offered no resistance. Our eyes met as the sun broke over the horizon, bathing us both in a beautiful amber glow. I reached up and placed a hand alongside of his jawline and he rested his face against it, he closed his eyes for a moment and when he opened them again, I could see the desperate need and desire to belong there. He asked for so little of me demanded nothing but my love and I could never fully give it to him. Now here, on this desolate far away planet, in a future that was not ours, I knew that whatever it was that drew us together could never be broken. Somehow, in some way, we always would find a way back to each other. I wanted to belong to those soft eyes, those tender touches and that goofy smile. I needed him as much as he needed me. I reached out and grabbed hold of handfuls of his thick flight jacket, tugging on it, drawing him near and closed the distance between our bodies. My heart was pounding furiously in my chest, and I was dripping with sweat. The anger and tension was melting away. My knees started to weaken but I didn’t care. I brought my lips to his, leaving them resting against the petal softness of his own and whispered to him. “Brock, I lov..” before I could finish the sentence, he kissed me unexpectedly. Never, in our time together had he ever been the one to initiate a kiss, it was always me. I had never seen this side of him before. Brock was changing; I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. He wasn’t the shy, timid boy that I had known before; so much had happened to him here on Prox that he had to change, and evolve into the strong confident man that was standing here in front of me. It truly excited me. Those cool, soft lips felt wonderful against mine and I let him lead me into a strange, forceful embrace that sent chills down my spine. At that moment in time, he had full control over me, he was the commander of my emotions, and I his willing subservient. I would die for him. I could almost mistake these feelings as the same ones I felt when I was with Benjamin; it frightened me, and quickly chased the thought out of my head. Why was I thinking of Ben while in Brock’s arms? I had to learn to stop doing that. His body was hard and ridged against mine, and I continued to clutch at the material of his jacket to keep myself from falling over. Swirling one hand down over my shoulder, he brought it back around behind me, and rested it on my lower back, letting his fingers slip underneath my shirt with delightful ease. His touch was like ice, and my body was burning up from the inside out. I could feel each fingertip on my skin as he caressed it with a loving gentleness. Enjoying the moment, I had almost not noticed that my vision began to blur, and the pain in my chest increase. I tried to shove the agonizing feeling away, but with every push, it pushed back and soon I found myself gasping for breath. I clutched on to his thin body, trying to bring myself back around, but something was pulling me away. I couldn’t fight it. Sensing my distress, he released his lips from mine and everything started to go dark. The fingers that were holding onto his jacket weren’t enough to keep me upright, and I found myself starting to sink down to my knees. He kept his arms wrapped around me and help ease me down to the ground so I wouldn’t fall and injure myself. I could hear him calling to me, but he sounded so far away and distant. As my body sank down onto the damp sand of the Prox planet, I looked up to the early morning sky and saw a fleet of airships fly overhead. Oh god, it was the F.E.C., they found us. “Brock, run… please…run…” My lips formed the words, but no sound came out as I drifted into unconsciousness. 

I woke up to the sound of muffled voices. Brock! Where was he, did he make it out? I sat up in bed and switched on the bedside lamp. I didn’t have to reach out and grasp for it, I knew right where it was. Why did I know this? No, this wasn’t Prox. The room instantly began to fill with a dim, luminescent glow. I couldn’t tell if it were day or night, because all the windows were covered up with a heavy, black material. I hated the bright daybreak sunlight over the ocean, and had requested that the windows be covered up to block it out. As I looked around the room, I saw the familiar faces in photo frames smiling back at me, promo photos for album covers. No.. it can’t be. Not again. I pulled the blanket down away from my body and noticed that the wounds that the Carnivore had dug into my skin were gone. They never existed. No... This isn’t right, I can’t be here. Not again. I don’t belong here! The voices outside the room grew louder, a man and a woman were arguing. I stood up, noticing that I was only wearing pants, nothing else, and then a wave of dizziness hit me, forcing me back down to the bed. I wasn’t quite ready for moving yet. I was back at the beach house in the past. I didn’t want to be here. As I looked around for my glasses, the door swung open and a woman with striking blond hair and a harsh almost frigid look to her stepped into the room, followed by Ron who was not looking pleased.

“Looking for these darling?” The woman chimed, her voice sounding like nails on a chalkboard. I cringed and shuddered. She held up my glasses in her hand by the earpiece, teasing me with them just out of reach. “You shouldn’t really leave your valuable stuff just lying around in any old room where you fap to.” She pulled her ruby red painted lips back exposing her perfectly white teeth in a mockery of a smile, and laughed. “I found them in Ron’s room this time.”

Ron frowned and grabbed the glasses out of her hand and brought them to me. “Fuck you Crystal.” He mumbled. I took the glasses from him and slid them onto my face and stared at the woman and felt a pit of despair open up in my stomach. Standing in the room, dressed in her best form fitting scarlet red pencil dress was Crystal Lynn Bates, my ex-wife. It had been years since I last laid eyes on her, and our break up was not in the least bit friendly in any way. We both decided that it was best for our own sanity that we made sure our paths never crossed again, and now here she was, standing right in front of me. I knew I wasn’t mentally ready for a confrontation with her, nor I would ever be. 

“No thank you Ron, I am afraid Dustin’s already beat you to that, but if you like we can try—I was always curious to find out if you were a top or bottom.” She laughed, amused at her own off color joke. No one else even cracked a smile. 

“Why are you here, Crystal?” I asked. I was more curious as to why I was back here too, but her presence was more of a pressing issue. We had said all we had to say, and I thought she was completely out of my life, but now here she was, standing in the bedroom of my house, and I wanted her gone. 

Ron came to sit down on the edge of the bed, next to me. I had a feeling that he was trying his best to act as guard. “I am sorry Dustin, it’s my fault. You gave us all a scare when you passed out during the Monster video shoot and the paramedics assured us that it was just from exhaustion so they brought you back here, and we put you to bed. In all the confusion, with so many people moving in and out of the house, she slipped in and started demanding to see you. I wanted to call the cops right away, but Brock said not to; we could deal with this by ourselves.”

Crystal threw her sequin clutch bag down onto the bed and raised an eyebrow. “That boy can be easily persuaded, all you have to do is offer him ice cream money and he’s all yours.” She laughed. Neither Ron nor I laughed, and she dropped her second failed attempt at humor. “Come on guys, we’re all friends here, lighten up a bit.” Ron shot her an angry face, which thankfully ended her attempts at humor. “Well I guess that’s enough joking around. I will tell you why I am here, after he leaves.” She pointed at Ron who simply shook his head.

“Nope. Not going to happen, lady.” His face was stark and serious as it ever could be. “If you seriously think I am going to leave you alone in here with Dustin, then you’re even more nuts then I thought you were. You are not manipulating him again.” Ron was quickly losing patience. He had a very clear hate for her and everything that she stood for, and she returned the sentiment. 

She rolled her eyes and ignored him, turning her attention to me instead. “Dustin, what can it hurt to give me simply five minutes of your time alone without your dog hmm? I think that we’re both adult enough to handle a simple conversation, by ourselves without a chaperone. Come on, it’s a small request, pretty please? It’s not like I am going to seduce you or anything, right? You’re already most of the way undressed, but I’ll need at least 6 minutes for that, you were always the difficult one.” She winked at me. I wanted to vomit.

Ron scowled. “No, and if you call me a dog one more time Crystal I will drag you out of this house kicking and screaming by the your neck.”

She approached him and reached out to run her fingers mockingly through his blonde hair. “So tempting! I love the sadistic way you like to tease me. Oh Ron, you’re so precious, all ferocious and frightening, you’re going to make a wonderful addition to the Carnivores, they do so love the violent type.” She snickered, and fixed her eyes on me, waiting for a reaction.

Furious, Ron grabbed her wrist and stood up. “I think it’s time for you to leave.”

“Ron wait!” I stood up from the bed and came to stand between them, and put my hand on his, taking a moment to steady myself. I wanted to hear what she had to say. Her casual comment about the Carnivores was more than enough to grab my attention, but it worked. She knew something about Prox. “Give me 5 minutes with her, it will be okay. Don’t worry about me. Set your watch if you must, 5 minutes, that’s all. I promise, I won’t let her manipulate me in any way.” He gave me a look of apprehension and released her wrist, immediately walking over to the door and pulling it open.

“You’ve got 5 minutes. One second over and I will come in here and pull you out myself.”

Crystal winked at him. “I heard you’re good a pulling out, Ron.”

He started to say something, but I cut him off. “Ron—don’t!” Slamming the door shut, Ron walked out without another word. I could hear him pacing on the other side.

The moment he left the room, I turned toward her. “You aren’t Crystal. Who are you, really and what do you want?”

“You’re getting quick to catch on to this alternate reality thing, aren’t you?” She smiled and tilted her head so that her long, blond hair cascaded down her shoulders, giving her an almost innocent appearance. “Since our time is precious, I will make this quick. The F.E.C. has almost limitless technology, we can do pretty much anything we want, including sending our brain waves to an alternate reality to assimilate a viable body for a very short amount of time and make use of it, which is exactly how I am here. I won’t get into the details of it, because at the moment, the process is far too complicated for your brain to comprehend. That being said, you have something I want, and I have something you want. We make a deal, and I will be out of your hair, and this body returned to its owner. Easy as that.”

“What could you possibly have that I want Crystal? I’ve seen this all before. There is nothing for me here in this life.” In truth, I didn’t want any part of this world. Everyone had what they wanted. Success, happiness, a family, everything. Except for me. I was the only one who didn’t have something to hold onto and call my own, except for the music. That was always mine; I wouldn’t let anyone ever take that away from me. 

Her expression changed to one of delight. “Oh you silly boy. It has nothing to do with this life at all.” She leaned in and brought her lips to my ear. I could smell the scent of her expensive perfume. “It’s the very thing you’ve been looking for on Prox. The one thing you’d give up the entire world for, the one thing you are missing.”

“Benjamin.” I whispered.

“Mmm hmm. Yes. He is safely tucked away for the moment at one of our facilities, sedated and well-guarded. With little thanks from Thomas Bell, that is. He almost ruined the entire operation because of his pathetic crush on him. We had our operatives detain him before the main strike commenced against the messengers. Benjamin was removed from the base, and Thomas had absolutely no idea what was happening right under his nose, he even conducted a search for him. We allowed Thomas to continue the assault on the base, because it was simply a means to an end. We knew that he was insane, but allowing him to proceed with his own plans worked out well. His methods may be questionable, but they were effective. Now the Messenger base is ours and we have a valuable commodity to trade.”

“I swear to god if you fucks hurt him…”

“Oh stop. We’re not monsters, not all of us anyway. He’s not injured. Well, not any more than he was, Thomas did leave him blind and weakened but you can have him back, returned to you safely. All you have to do is make a bargain with me, right here, right now and when… or IF you return, he will be waiting for you. See how easy things can be? We’re not the horrible monsters you all make us out to be, we can be reasoned with.”

“What could I possibly have that you want?”

Crystal reached out and put her hand on my bare chest, dragging her long painted red nails over my skin. “So much Dustin, oh so much.” Giving me a seductive smile, she drifted her hand down to below my navel and let it rest there as she spoke. “You have no clue how your ideas will change the future Dustin.” She let her fingers play at the waistband of my pants. “Your dreams and desires will shape the world that we know, and that is what I need, the thing I am after. Give them to me and Burnley can be yours again, think about it… he can be in your arms once more, whispering to you... Touching you…” Dropping her hand down, she brought the palm of her hand between my legs and squeezed gently. “….feeling you.”

My brain told me to get away from her, call to Ron and have her removed, but my heart wouldn’t listen. She knew where Ben was being kept, she had information that I needed, so I held my ground, but pulled her hand away. “How am I supposed to give you those things, they aren’t something you can just hand over. You are talking nonsense.”

“You’ve written it all down already. The book. The Prox Transmissions. Everything we need is chronicled in there. You’ve collected it for us; all the answers that we need to achieve total domination of the planet and more! Somehow, you knew without knowing. Give me the book and I will give Benjamin to you. I know that there is currently only one copy in existence, a proof, and it’s here, in this house, hidden somewhere. I am not one for tearing things apart if I can help it, nor do I have the time, so if you simply run out there like a good boy, get me the book, I’ll be gone in no time, and when you return to Prox. He’s yours.”

I thought about what Brock told me about the book. It was a fictional story that I had written to go along with our music, that’s all it was, but I had no memory of ever writing it. I had only seen it briefly once before when I was in this time line, but in that amount of time I held it in my hands, I scanned through the pages and saw everything about Prox, the Messengers, and the F.E.C. all detailed on its pages. There were sections outlining the manufacture and alteration of the visors that they used to brainwash people with, as well as instructions for mass production of Carnivores. Everything that had happened to me on that planet was written in there, on a perfect timetable, laid out between the covers, just waiting to be revealed. Everything I wrote about but couldn’t remember was coming to life. I couldn’t help to wonder what else might lay in those pages. To have the spoilers for the end of the world in your hands could be a very powerful weapon. Whatever it was, I knew that I could not let her have it. I took a step back, away from her, my bare feet sinking into the thick, plush carpeting. “I can’t let you have it. If I hand that book over to you, I will be writing a death sentence for the entire human race still living on Prox. I can’t do that.”

Crystal moved toward the end of the bed, away from me. “Are you really willing to exchange Ben’s life for the life of strangers that you have absolutely no responsibility for? You have NO life worth living here, Dustin, you know this… if you need proof just look around! There, on Prox.. you do! Hand over the book to me and I will guarantee you that you and Benjamin will be able to live out the rest of your lives without being run down by the F.E.C. We can grant you everything that you possibly could ever want, even living the rest of your lives in luxury. Forget about the Messengers, they aren’t your concern. This can finally be the happy ending that you’ve always wanted. No stress, no struggle, no Monsters, just you and him together, forever. After all the pages and chapters in your life, that you’ve been through, let me write you the ending that you deserve.”

Her words struck at my heart with an unrelenting force. I so desperately wanted to be with Ben, to have that life which she spoke of, we both deserved it. I thought back to how wonderful it felt to be in his arms, to spend the night in his bed and wake up next to him. I needed to go back to that again. One night wasn’t enough. I couldn’t have him here, he had a family, but on Prox, he could be my family. Everything I ever wanted was right at my fingertips. My mind went to Brock and that beautiful, silly smile of his, was he not family as well? If I chose Ben, then I would lose him, and I felt as though I just got him back into my life; I wasn’t quite ready to let him go yet. Why was this all coming down to me, and my decisions? I was a singer, not some brilliant engineer whose ideas were monumental and mind blowing, all I wanted to do was be on stage and entertain a crowd, make people happy for a little while. This... this was too much. 

“Dustin, the book please? Tell me where it is?” Crystal asked, giving me a soft smile. I knew that she could tell what I was thinking. She hit a nerve within me when she mentioned Benjamin, and now that she had hold of it, all she had to do was twist it to torment me. 

I lowered my head and spoke quietly. “I am not giving it to you.” I couldn’t believe what I was saying. With these words, I was giving up Ben.

Crystal sighed and picked up her purse from the bed. “You know that by doing this, you are signing Burnley’s death warrant. The F.E.C. will tear him apart in the worst possible way and make sure that you hear each agonizing scream echo through your head at night, repeating, going on forever and ever until you become insane from the grief. Please Dustin, I am begging you. Do this. For you. For him. Let yourself be happy for once.”

I slowly raised my head and looked her right in the eyes, meeting her gaze with defiance. “I said no.” My voice did not tremble or waver, even though I knew that these words may very well be my own downfall, I put every bit of strength and courage into them. I did not bow to her. I refused. There could be another way to save Benjamin. I would find it. 

Shaking her head, she gave me a small smile. “Okay. If that is your choice, just remember that you made it, and everything that happens from here on out is because of you. It’s a sad thing, that you really don’t realize how greatly one small action can change the future.” Unzipping her purse, I watched in horror as she pulled a gun from the pocket and held it out to me, pulling back the hammer and cocking it without any sign of emotion. “Last chance to reconsider; hand over the Prox book, Bates.”

“Crystal, Jesus Christ, put the gun down!” I shouted. At that particular moment, the five minutes ended. I heard Ron’s watch beep outside the door and it started to open. I wanted to scream at him, warn him, stop him from entering, but I stood frozen, unable to move or react. As the door craned open, in slow motion, Crystal whirled around and caught him off guard. His annoyed expression turned to one of shock and horror as his eyes set on the weapon before him. It was pointed right at his head. His eyes went from the weapon in front of him to me, looking for an explanation. “NO!” I yelled, and she moved her arm slightly, lowered the gun, bringing it down to one of his knees and pulled the trigger. There was a bright flash of light followed by an ear shattering pop, and Ron hit the floor, screaming in agony. Her aim was perfect; she shot one of his kneecaps, shattering it completely, and spraying blood and pieces of bone all over the bedroom. The sound of the gunshot brought Adam running in from the living room. He barged into the bedroom, still carrying a piece of pizza that he was eating, and she moved her aim to him, pointing the gun at his head now. “STOP! CRYSTAL!” I shouted.

“This is your choice, remember Bates? MOVE!” I followed her lead and joined Adam near the door, trying my best to avoid stepping on Ron who was writhing on the floor, clutching at his wound, muttering profanities. I wanted to stop and help him, but I knew she would never allow it. She led us out of the bedroom, into the living room and motioned for us to sit down on the couch. Adam looked at me for answers, but I had none. “That was a warning to you. I still have more bullets in this gun and there are a lot more targets. The ball is still in your court, Dustin. Tell me where it is and I put the gun down and walk out of here. Refuse me and I will destroy everything you love, here… and on Prox. Starting with your drummer. She pointed the gun down at him. We can see how well he can play without his hands.” She laughed and winked at me. “I’ll give you a few minutes to reconsider while I take a look around.” Her words were calm and horrifyingly relaxed as she walked around the room, keeping the gun pointed at us, while rifling through our belongings. Bright red spots of blood flecked the front of her dress and her arms, but she paid them no mind. 

Adam leaned over to me, looking pale and shaking, whispering. “Is she out of her goddamn mind? Did you see what she did…she SHOT Ron!” He turned around and looked to the bedroom, where Ron was moaning, laying in a rapidly growing pool of his own blood. “Dustin, what the hell does she want?”

I noticed that there was a droplet of Ron’s blood on my glasses. I took them off and tried to wipe it clean, but instead only ended up smearing it over the lenses. Sighing, I placed the glasses back on my face. “She wants the Prox Transmissions book.”

“What? Your book? Then give it to her, for fuck’s sake Dustin it’s not worth killing people over. Crystal has always been a bit crazy, but now she’s a psychopathic lunatic with a weapon.” Adam begged. “It’s just a goddam book!”

I shook my head and rubbed my eyes. “It’s not that simple, Adam. You’re not going to believe me, but that book has things in it that can change the future. I can’t let her have it.”

Turning around briefly, Adam looked over his shoulder at Ron who had propped himself up to lean his back against the door frame, looking ashen and pale, blood spilling out from between the fingers he had been clutching tightly on the wound with. His head was resting against the wall, and his breathing was ragged and shallow. He was losing blood too rapidly. “Come on Dustin, look at him!” Adam pointed, raising his voice slightly. “The whole Starset society thing and the Message are fake, you know this because you made it up, but this crosses the line. This is fucking serious. Ron’s going to bleed out if we don’t get him to a hospital soon. Just give her the fucking book or whatever she wants and let’s be done with this before someone dies. This isn’t a game!”

“Yes, by all means, hand over the book, Dustin.” Crystal mocked. She slowly made her way back over to the couch where we were sitting and stood in front of us. “I am done with asking nicely.” Bringing her arm up, she pointed the gun at Adam, the barrel centered between his eyes. A terrified expression came across his face, he knew his fate. “No one likes drummers anyway, so I’ll just go ahead and take out the trash for you, so we can move on and get this over with.” 

Once again, she pulled the hammer of the gun back and her finger slipped on to the trigger. I was on my feet in an instant, but she was faster than I was and pulled her arm back, from the aiming position, bringing the metal handle of the gun down and crashing into my skull with an ear shattering thud. She had smashed the hard metal down into my head without mercy. A white hot bolt of pain shot through my head and I fell down to my knees on the floor, feeling a warm oozing sensation of blood trickling down the side of my face. I managed to bring my head back up, just in time to see Adam take advantage of her momentary distraction and lunge for her. “No!” I shouted. Across the room, the front door to the house opened up and I caught sight of Brock walking in, backpack slung over one shoulder, headphones on, carrying a brown paper grocery bag and twirling his house keys around his finger. He entered the living room at the same moment Adam’s large body collided with Crystal’s, knocking her off balance and sending them both down to the floor. As they fell, her finger jerked, pulling the trigger and the gun went off in a loud blast, and then it dropped and landed on the carpet, the barrel smoking and spent. Adam was on top of her, not hesitating to deliver a few blows with his fist to her face, until she was unconscious. Holding my injured head in my hand, I struggled to my feet and grabbed at his shoulder, pulling him off of her. He slowly stood up, gazing dully at his now blood covered knuckles. “Adam, hey man… are you okay?” I asked, not quite sure what to say.

“Stay down, bitch!” he screamed at Crystal. Taking a deep breath, and then looked over to the bedroom door where Ron still was and rushed over to him, pulling his phone out of his pocket. I rushed over and joined him as he started dialing the numbers to call for an ambulance... Ron was still alive, but his blood loss was massive and he was fading in and out of consciousness. I knelt down beside him and gingerly touched his arm. His eyes fluttered open and he nodded to me. “Help is on the way, just stay with us okay?” I could hear Adam behind me, speaking quietly into the phone, giving the paramedics the address. 

“I knew I should have never left her alone with you, that woman… she’s trouble.” He grinned. 

“From now on, I will always take your advice and listen to you. I promise.” We shared a smile and then I felt Adam’s hand on my shoulder, his fingers boring into my flesh. I looked up to see him staring over at the front door, his eyes transfixed on something. I stood up and followed his gaze over to the entrance and my heart stopped. 

Spilling out from a grocery bag were tubs of ice cream, scattered all over the floor, some with their lids popped open and leaking, the melting confection mixing with a deep red pool of blood that was oozing out from underneath Brock’s motionless body. His headphones and backpack had been thrown across the room as well, the force of the gunshot sending everything in different directions. “Oh my god…BROCK!” I heard Adam’s phone drop and hit the floor as I ran over to him. During the struggle, Crystal’s gun had gone off; sending the bullet into Brock’s mid-section as he entered the living room. He now laid on the floor, clutching at the tattered remains of his stomach, he was holding his insides together with shaking hands. I hit the floor and had to turn away from the grisly sight for a moment. I could clearly see the pulsing layers of intestine oozing out from between his fingers. 

“…dustin? What happened?” He asked with a weak voice. I turned my gaze back to him, trying my best to keep myself together and the tears from streaming down my face. Adam and Ron were both looking over at me, in horror. “…it hurts..”

“I am right here Brock. Don’t talk okay? We are getting help.” I didn’t know what to say to him. 

A trickle of blood formed in the corner of his mouth. “I am…glad you’re okay. I got some ice cream for us to share. It always makes me feel better; I thought that you could use some too after that video shoot. It was pretty crazy, wasn’t it?” He started to cough, his whole body wracked with spasms of pain. I reached out and put one of my hands over his, the blood was warm and thick, and I didn’t care. I wanted to hold his hand; it might be for the last time. He winced and struggled for breath. “I guess it’s not good now huh? Damn, that was mint chocolate chip, your favorite.”

“Brock, I don’t need ice cream to make me happy.” I took my free hand and ran it through his hair, smoothing it back away from his forehead. “My happiness comes when I look at you and see your smile. You bring out something inside of me that no one else does. I can’t ever be lost alone in the dark when you’re around because, you are one of the brightest stars in the universe, and you can light up entire galaxies with that smile.”

“You should turn those words into lyrics. They’d make a beautiful song.” He tried to laugh, but it turned into a cough wracking his entire body with spasms. He swallowed hard, as the warm tears escaped his eyes and he closed his eyes for a moment and whispered. “It hurts so much, Dustin. I don’t think I am going to make it.” Opening his eyes, he tried to sit up and look down at the wound in his stomach, but I lightly laid a hand on his chest and eased him back down. There was no need for him to see the fatal wound. 

I wanted to take him into my arms and hold him, but I couldn’t. I struggled for words. “Help is on the way, they will come take you to the hospital and patch you up, you will be back on stage, defying gravity again in no time, just hang in there Brock. They will take all the pain away. Stay with me.”

Almost as if to prove my point, the sounds of sirens from miles away started blaring. With a bit of luck, they would be here soon. I looked over to the window, hoping to see the tell-tale red flashing, from the street below, but there was nothing yet. Brock shook his head. “That’s not what I mean, Dustin.” Slipping a blood stained hand out from underneath mine; he reached up and touched my cheek. “The pain isn’t from the wound, it’s from my heart. I have a regret deep inside that’s been eating away at me for so long, something I need to tell you… before it’s too late……please listen.”

Adam walked across the room. “FUCK! What’s taking them so long?” I shot him an annoyed glance. “Brock, shut up you are not going to fucking die. Not you, not Ron. No one! So just stop talking about it!” He started to pace, and kicked Brock’s backpack halfway across the room in anger. I stared at it as the contents went skittering across the floor, guitar picks, comic books and video game discs. Everything that Brock loved now lay in a heap on the floor. “GOD DAMN IT! I can’t stand here and watch this. I am going outside to flag them down.” 

“Adam!” I called after him, but it was too late. He was already out the door and halfway down the beach, running at full speed to catch the ambulance that was probably still miles away. Brock’s body was suddenly wracked with a violent convulsion and he screamed out in pain, tears streaming down his face. All I could do is sit there and wait for it to end; there was nothing I could do. The feeling of helplessness was tearing me apart. As the seizure passed, his body relaxed a little bit, and he came back around, at least for the moment. The look on his face was filled with sadness; we both knew that he wasn’t going to make it. 

“Dustin, I need to tell you… please come closer.” He whispered. His hands were now shaking uncontrollably as his body went into shock, his lips stained red with blood. I leaned down and listened to his quiet words. “My regret, in this life and in any other, if there any other lives after this… is that I never told you that… I love you.”

My heart exploded. I couldn’t go through this again. Why was this happening to me? I tried my best to soothe him, even though I was dying too, dying inside of grief. “You are a great friend to me, and you always have been Brock. You have always been there for me, even when I tried to push you away. You stuck with me, in good times and bad. I don’t deserve to call you my friend; you are a good, decent soul.”

“No. Not friend. Something…. more. I was always afraid to tell you. You’re a brilliant, intelligent man, Dustin Bates. The ideas that you have are going to make the future a good place for all of us. I could never tell you that I loved you because I knew you were destined for these great things. I couldn’t possibly tie you down; you need to soar into the unknown, free and fearless.” He struggled to keep his eyes open. “So I am telling you this now, Dustin Bates. I love you. You will never know the beauty I see when you open your shadows… They will never know… I’ll see you again….. in the starlight…A place where we can be together, just you and I. Forever….” He smiled at me, that silly, beautiful smile, looking deep into my eyes and then closed his.

“Brock… no.. god damn it… open your eyes!” I shouted. “Please, stay with me, you don’t know how much I need you, stay with me. Don’t leave me… don’t leave me alone. I need you, I need you, I need you.” I kept repeating the same words over and over. I felt the breath escape his lungs one last time and then his body go limp. I screamed and grabbed him, holding him tight against me, shaking his thin shoulders, I wanted him to wake up. First Lizzie and now Brock. It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Not here anyway. This was a place where HE was going to be happy, and I ruined it. I ruined it by pulling him into my life. Still sitting across the room, Ron turned his head and looked away, uncharacteristically quiet, and unable to bear the sight before him.

I heard the click of a gun being cocked. Slowly I opened my eyes, still holding Brock’s body and looked behind me to see Crystal standing in the center of the room, near where Brock’s backpack was, her face swollen and bloody, pointing the gun at me. Spitting out a mouthful of broken teeth and blood, she grinned at me. “The Free Energy Corporation would like to thank you, Mr. Bates for your cooperation in our endeavor. Just like the boy said as he died. You are going to change the future.” I stared in horror as she held up the only copy of the Prox Transmission book in her hand. It had been tucked inside of Brock’s backpack and slipped out when Adam kicked it across the room. Brock had it the entire time. The sound of sirens were louder now, almost deafening. They were right outside. Crystal limped toward the large glass doors that led out of the back of the house and down to the beach, sliding one of them open. “I am going to be leaving now, but before I go… two things. One: I am going to be sure that word gets to Prox that Benjamin Burnley is to suffer. They are going to kill him slowly, one agonizing breath at a time. The F.E.C. will bring him down to his knees, begging for mercy. Your magnificent leader, lover and whatever else he was to you will die cursing your name for leaving him to this fate. I will personally tell him what your choice was. All that sorrow will rest on your shoulders, Bates.” 

I could hear voices out in the hallway now. They would be in the room any second. I refused to let go of Brock, I held onto him tighter. I wasn’t ever going to let go ever again. I wouldn’t let anyone take him away from me. Brock was mine. I pushed him away time and time again. I learned from my mistakes. All I had to do is wait, and they would have her. Crystal stepped outside the bay doors, and I could feel the cool ocean breeze wash over me. It felt refreshing. She started to walk away and then stopped, turning around and lifting her arm up. Adam rushed in with the paramedics. 

“And number two…” With a grin, she aimed the gun at me and pulled the trigger. Every single person in the room froze. There was a loud blast of sound and I felt an incredible pressure penetrate my skull from between my eyes, my head snapped back, the smell of gunpowder invading my nostrils. I watched for a moment as she ran out the door, sprinting down the beach at a break neck speed and off to the distance. The police rushed in and followed in pursuit after her. Adam moved in front of me. I think he was shouting something, I don’t know, I couldn’t hear it. I felt my body crumple to the ground, coming to rest next to Brock’s. Someone grabbed Adam by the shoulders and pulled him away from me. I tried to reach out for him, but my arms wouldn’t move. There was blood everywhere. From my vantage point, I could see the paramedics rush over to Ron and speak to him, he responded, thankfully he was still alive. There was an incurable ringing in my ears and it hurt like hell. My eyes focused on the strange, sticky puddles of melted ice cream and comic books on the floor soaked in blood. I couldn’t bear looking at them, I wanted my eyes to close, but they wouldn’t. The paramedics skirted around the room, and placed Ron on a stretcher and quickly rushed him out. The carpet where he had fallen was soaked in blood, there was so much of it, I wondered how it was going to be possible to be cleaned. There were so many people in the room now, I lost track of where Adam went. I wondered why no one was coming to help me, all I needed was someone to help me to my feet. I wanted to stay with Brock, what had they done with him? Please, don’t leave me alone; don’t take him away from me!!! 

My eyes caught sight of black combat boots moving in from the door and slowly walking across the room. I knew who they belonged to. Benjamin. I knew he’d come for me! Something in my head whispered the words ‘the shepherd of the damned’ and a cold shiver ran down my spine. He walked over to where I was laying on the carpet and knelt down. He looked heartbroken and devastated. Glancing up, he asked Adam a question. I couldn’t read his lips, or hear what they were saying, but Ben simply shook his head and sighed. I wish I could have heard what they were talking about. Reaching out, Ben whispered something very quietly, and touched his fingertips on my forehead. It ‘felt ‘like a prayer. I never knew him to be the religious one, but somehow I felt comforted by his silent words. Moving his fingers down, he placed them on my eyes and forced them closed.

The incessant beeping of a heart monitor woke me up. My eyes flicked open and I lay there for long moments, staring at the unremarkable ceiling. I wanted to die. I lost everything. Bringing my hands up to my face, I rubbed my eyes and noticed the IV tubing attached to a vein in my arm. It wasn’t plastic, but a strange, organic material that I had never seen before. I glanced over, following the length of tubing over to the IV wrack that was attached to a very odd looking futuristic machine, which was pumping fluids into my body. Sitting next to it on a chair, his body propped up against the wall, sleeping was Brock! I was back on Prox. I breathed a deep sigh of relief. He was still alive. I looked around the room to see that I was in some sort of triage area of a military facility. There were several empty beds all lined up along the walls here, neatly made and in pristine condition, waiting for patients. The walls were painted a light green color, and in an eye catching bright gold font the words ‘The Shallow Bay’ were emblazoned across the top. We made it. I held my head in my hands and sobbed uncontrollably. Somehow, Brock got us to safety. I owed him everything. 

Stretching his long legs out, Brock sat up and looked over at me. No longer dressed in the stark, black F.E.C. uniform, he had a pair of khaki colored pants on with combat boots and a tight fitting casual shirt on that accentuated each muscle in his torso. I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes off of him. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.” He laughed and smiled at me. Oh god... That smile. I broke down and crudely wiped the tears away from my eyes. 

“You have no idea how happy I am to see you, Brock. I thought… I lost you forever.”

Raising an eyebrow, he looked at me sympathetically. “What? Has the infection reached your brain now?”

“Infection? I... don’t understand.” 

Brock got up from this bedside chair and walked over to my bed. He patted my legs and I moved them over so he could sit with me. “Those wounds on your chest were infected, and during our escape from the Messenger’s base, between that and being dehydrated, you started to run a fever.” He shook his head and scowled. “I should have seen it, I know all the signs, but I just missed it, I was preoccupied with other things.” He sighed. “Anyway, you passed out on me, just as Messengers from the Shallow Bay found us during a routine patrol. Good thing they did too, because I wouldn’t have been able to carry you AND Thomas the rest of the way to the base.”

“Thomas.” I bit my bottom lip. “Where is he?” I asked, not quite sure I wanted to know the answer.

“I don’t think that you need to worry about him right now. He’s being taken care of. You just need to take a day or so to recover. Take care of yourself first. I am not about to let you jump right into things in your weakened state. Give it a day or to until you get back on your feet. Reset and regroup and then we will sort things out, we are safe here, and we have time.”

I grabbed hold of his shirt. “Brock, I know where Benjamin is. The F.E.C. has him! We have to go after him right now; they are going to kill him.” 

Brock laid a hand on my thigh and smiled at me. His demeanor was calm and confident; he did not withdraw or become angry at the mention of Ben’s name. What was going on? His words were comforting and reassuring, it frightened me to see just how calm he was about it. “Dustin, I am going to ask you to trust me on this and let me handle it. Will you?”

I gazed into his eyes, they were filled with light and so alive, I knew that there was no way that I could ever refuse him, not now, not ever. The person that Brock was becoming was someone assertive and fiercely protective… and I was falling in love with him all over again.


End file.
